Wee Chye Kee

Wee Chye Kee

Ever since I have memory about my childhood, what I remember about my grandfather is he will give me pocket money. Besides that, my favorite time is when my grandfather go for morning walk, he would bring me to the playground. 

Now, he had gone to another place and I believe that he would be better there. The place where my grandmother went 2 years ago. The land without pain and sorrow. He left us at 2pm this afternoon. 

Thank you for being such a caring and beloved grandparent to us all. You'll be in our heart. 

I love you, my grandfather. Wee Chye Kee. 

Learn

Learn

This is the worst day of my life. Bad things happened. Nothing is good. Or maybe one, that I'm still living. The pressure is forcing me. Hard. It's like suffocating. Or it's like I might die any minute. I realize, when I wanna talk to someone, I got nobody to turn to. I'm alone. I tried. But it's like I'm giving people pressure. I shouldn't. People don't have to listen to my crap. Anyway, nobody really wanna listen and willing to listen. Even the one I care and love. I know you're reading this. Probably forcing yourself to think that I'm not writing about you. Well, if you're happy this way. I'll just bare with it. Someone told me, the only thing I can do is bare with it. Even if I mind, I jealous, I mad, I sad, I emo, no matter what I do it's all the same. Yea I'm pessimistic. Sorry, I can't help. 

Besides, my lappie just have to let me down at this time, even the clothe I like has problem. Everything just have to come together. Well, it's good in a way. So that I won't have to be furious separate into few days. Come in one go is great. Someday, I'll learn to not worry, to not care, to not feel. That's when I'm there with popo.

After so many years, I'm sick of these.

I shall make a move.

Dear Mr Pathetic

Dear Mr Pathetic

Dear Mr Pathetic, 

How are you? Well, this question is kinda stupid to ask. I thought you are well all the while. Should I or not talk to you in this way? Sarcastic huh? Did I become a threat to you and push you into the corner? You don't even know exactly for what reason I hate you and won't tolerate. It's not what you did a year ago, but the time when you don't see me as a FRIEND. That's not the way to treat a friend. Am I in self acquisition? Because I don't even know if you're even talking about me. What happened last December, I wouldn't forget. I've never been disregard by anyone before. I thought we were friend, best friend. But I can't understand how could you do that to me. I thought of giving you a chance, but you just missed it. I think I'll talk to you one day when I feel like it again. Wonder if you would read this. How do you feel. That's what I think. This letter. 

Love, 

Ly

W • O • R • K

W • O • R • K

I spoke to a friend, he has lose his motivation and passion in his current job. Well talking about work, human live to work? Or do they work to live? It's a chicken and egg question anyway.

I love to work, especially with fun and passionate people. This sounds naive. In the corporate world, it's all about status, politic and power. I've gone through that. But nothing affect me because I'm not really gonna take that job as my career. That was just a short period of time. I'm talking about working in Kopitiam Asia Pacific Sdn Bhd, if you so happen to know what company is that. Of course, there were much politics happening in there. I'm blessed that I'm not one of the people who sacrifice because of politic. I love my colleagues. They were nice and helpful to me. I'm a new girl, know nuts about corporate environment. They brought me through. That could be one of the job I love so far.

I've been working pretty much since I was 15. Sis wanted me to get myself a partime job during my school holiday. I'm kinda lucky. Every job I get was decent and I feel grateful to all my bosses. So many kinda job, retail, promoter, teacher, sampling, sales, tester, marketing, etc etc. I remember each and every job. They were all great. I always love my bosses. Because they are great to me.

 

More and more pics, but I don't know where those picture went. LOL. As time goes by, sometimes I miss the time. With some people.

In a working environment, you see faces. Friendly face, polite face, fake face, dick face, stupid face, dumb face, sneaky face, angry face, fucked up face and etc etc. This is life. Life is all about work and work and work. Wonder if you work to live, or you live to work?

In A Month Time

In A Month Time

One month to go. Not that far thou. It's approaching. But, this time I don't feel a thing. Possibly cause I know it won't be anything.

I used to look forward to this very day every year since I left high school. But not anymore. I don't know why. It's not special anymore. I don't want this day to come. It won't be anything.

Years ago, when I was still in high school, it doesn't mean anything to me either. Because I don't have much friend back then. Not being appreciate. I was a nasty, arrogant, difficult, unfriendly, unsociable and unlikeable person. Hmm... Those are the best words to describe me I guess. That's why I never look forward to it. Until I met them, friends. The day started to mean something to me. I had some memorable one. They were really great. Really. I wish I can have it again. But I can't turn back time, nor make myself there.

What do I want? What's my wish? What do I hope for? Perhaps, something simple. Just a wonderful year ahead. That's enough. I know, I know, I'm greedy in a way. But that's really what I want. I don't mind if you wanna grant me what's on my wishlist. I'll be more than happy to receive those.

Perception

Perception

People has perception. People think what they think it is. You think that the animal is a chicken, in fact it is actually a duck. But you already have the perception that it is a duck, therefore no matter what people say, to you it will forever be a duck. Another type is people think that the way you react is a norm. That's the way you are, that's the way you behave and you react to thing.

I remember when I was still a kid, one day when my mum ask me if I threw the rubbish on the floor. I said no, in a very pleasant manner. My mum ended up screwed me. I didn't do that and tried to explain. And my mum said,"If it wasn't you, you scream your lungs out denying about what you didn't do. This is how you will react." I was so sad, just because my mum think that I would react that way and she made her decision on the result of that incident. I'm innocent.

Until now, I grow up. People has their perception on how I react to stuff. I'm narrow-minded. I tried to be someone. But I'm just being seen as no one.I might not be what I claim to be. But I'm certainly trying very hard to be one. Seeing me that way, does it mean that you actually know me well enough.

Nobody can understand someone perfectly. Not even my parents: They don't know me, don't even know about my thoughts. Am I pathetic?

Sicky Spring

Sicky Spring

Again, I think I should blog now. I read the drama all over again. It's still as exciting as it was. It's always a bell ringer to me, reminding me not to be overwhelm and over into it. I always remind myself.

I was sick for the past 3 weeks. Severely. Well, probably this is a good time to lose weight. Or perhaps not, because my two lovely and adorable housemate has been forcing me to eat so much. Did I gain weight instead? HAHA. Besides sickness, assignments and workload worries me. Assignments are over for the meantime, but I think I shall start doing the rest before I have to rush all together in one go again. That's hectic and stressful. 

Sometimes, I think I really have to learn how to be alone. Like really alone. No friend, no family, no boyfriend, no nothing. I shouldn't feel a thing, since I've been like this since I came here. 

I did something. Something that I felt guilt in me. Something I'd never did in my life. Something someone may feel disappointed about me. But, it is also something that some people would be excited about it. I'm not regret. I did not. Because I know it would be nice, and that's what I want. I just hope it would be carried out well. I hope, I really hope. 

It's Spring already. I hope everything will be nice. Flowers, sun shine, carnival, beach. That's what I see coming on the way. Wee~

Since the objectives of going back to Bolehland has been done 80% on the previous trip, I think I shall start another list. Including something that somebody promised me. Hehe. Watch me. 

"We'll be a dream"

Rehab

Rehab

Hmm... Probably I shall blog today, since I'm so free and lonely. LOL. 

Sickness has been sticking on me lately, mental sickness, physical sickness, everything. Sometimes I think I have depression. But I just haven't reach the extend that I would kill myself. haha. Well, like what's written on my profile, I'm emotionally unstable at times. Which means, I might cry now, and laugh afterward. I'm kinda crazy ain't I? Had been sick for weeks, maybe months. When can I go back to the me? I wanna be myself again.

Anyway, people around me just can't stop driving me crazy. Pressure is everywhere. This is a process I guess. For a better future? Or perhaps a better me in the future, that I learn to handle this. Probably one day, you won't see any expression on my face because I don't feel a thing.

Human are born to be alone, born to be lonely. Nobody can escape this. You came to this world as one, you leave this world as one too. I think I should go to rehab, my addiction needs a treatment, Hope it would be cure soon. This addiction is killing me. Mentally dependence is not good. I shall be like Debbie one day.  =)