If You Ever Gonna Read This

If You Ever Gonna Read This

I have changed perhaps, according to many people. Maybe I have. But after all, I'm just wanting something more in my life. Is that wrong? I wish I have more, a little bit more. But when I get what I want, people said I want too much and it is not what I deserve. Once I lost everything, literally everything. But when I'm back on track, I lost balance. I lost the balance of being a friend of theirs and a friend of the others. I could have be like what they want me and expect me to be. But I can't. I can't help to be like that. Someone dragged me into this. It shouldn't be this messy. YOU! You dragged me in, and you push everyone away, and now you want all of them by yourself. You are selfish and mean. I could have been better maybe to just stay ordinary, but you told me I could be different. Live better and be treated better. Well, after all I'm best to be ordinary, stick with what I have and what I can afford. I can't afford to be the way I was anymore. I feel sorry to myself. Sorry to everyone, except you. You're to blame. Like everyone said. I hate you, from now on. I hate you, from the bottom of my heart. Goodbye.